Jack Lemmon -- Being Somebody
Every one of us – at one time or another --has been plagued by self- doubt, “failure to engage” or what falls under what I have been known to call the I’m-Not-Good-Enough Syndrome. We question our abilities, our motivations, our own truth. Truth is, many of us tend to suffer alone with this ailment. The first truth, perhaps the most important truth, is that we are not alone.
Long ago at Fordham University, I met a very famous producer, Chick Vincent. He taught in the university’s Radio/TV department at the time, and over time, we developed a strong friendship. One morning in the coffee shop at the RCA Building, I was expressing to him my doubts regarding my ability to move forward in the communications business. He sat and listened and I just dug a hole…
"How in the world can I ever achieve anything of significance…I don’t know how to do this, do that, I certainly can’t do this as well as so-and-so does and I never will do as well as this guy or that guy…on and on. You get the picture.
Throughout the course of my misery-laden litany of shattered dreams and poor-me scenarios. Chick was dutifully attentive, shaking his head and smiling from time to time. I finished, finally…and Chick looked up from his coffee and said, “Frank, I’d like to tell you a story. Will you let me tell you a story?”
“Sure.”
"Y’know Frank, at least two to three times a year, in the absolute middle of the night, the phone rings. We’re talking 3 or 4 in the morning. Because I’m in a business that tends to keep unpredictable company, operate during unusual hours, and cater to shall we say “eclectic” personalities, I expect those calls…but in the early years, and for the longest time I would hear that ring and wonder who in hell would be calling at that hour. This night, my wife turned over closed her eyes tightly and I got up and stumbled over to the telephone.
A voice I recognized immediately said, "Chickie? Jack. How you doin’?”
Clumsily rubbing the sleep out of one eye, I mumbled “Oh, Hi, Jack. How you doin.”
“Not so good, Chick, I don’t know what’s going on. I’m sitting here (on location somewhere) and I don’t know…it’s over for me. It’s over – do you hear me? I’ve lost it. It’s gone…me. Its gone.”
I listened patiently to his panicked doomsday pronouncements for the better part of an hour –
“I can’t do what the director wants, the script changes every day, I don’t even like my character, I don’t want to be…to do this…to be this any more…I just can’t cut it. I don’t want to cut it. I’m done with this stuff.”
Tremendous self-doubt. Fear. The certainty that his career was over. And I was the only one he could call…I would listen and understand. I was awake by this time, thinking more clearly and I decided to take a shot at helping my friend get back in touch with the truth of his misery.
“Jack, you got it all wrong. Sure, I understand. I understand your pain because we all understand this kind of pain. We all endure it at some point…and it’s often the most successful of us that suffer the most. This is not the end of your journey…this is the beginning.”
Silence.
“So, Jack, when you’re suffering, I’ll always listen. You know that. But know this: the pain of self-doubt is not a lifestyle option. It’s OK to question yourself, because answers come from questions.”
Silence.
Finally, “Sorry, Chickie. Sorry for calling so late. Thanks for listening…I really needed some help and I didn’t know who else to call.”
“Don’t worry about it Jack. When you coming home?”
“I’ll be back in the States in about two weeks. This location thing is killing me.”
“Yeah, I know. When you get back, give me a call, willya? We’ll talk more about this...because the future is so bright for you my friend. So much to look forward to…so much yet to be experienced.”
“Thanks, Chickie. Talk to ya soon.”
Click.
I stumbled gratefully back to bed, sat down and did a quick retake of the conversation. My wife roused, grumbling…
“So who the hell was that?”
"Jack Lemmon. From somewhere the hell out there.”
Yeah. Jack Lemmon.
Jack Lemmon starred in more than 60 of the most memorable films in the history of film, including Some Like It Hot, The Apartment, Mister Roberts (for which he won the 1955 Best Supporting Actor Academy Award), Days of Wine and Roses, The Great Race, Irma la Douce, The Odd Couple, Save the Tiger (for which he won the 1973 Best Actor Academy Award), The Out-of-Towners, The China Syndrome, Missing (for which he won 'Best Actor' at the 1982 Cannes Film Festival), Glengarry Glen Ross, Grumpy Old Men and Grumpier Old Men.